How could you be so heartless

Well I guess that could be directed at many things but most importantly it is towards the travelers at the new hostel that I'm staying at. I am booked until tomorrow night but unsure on what I want to do. I haven't ventured around this large city too much so maybe heading to a smaller suburb would be the right decision but also who knows. I'm hoping to hear from the girl I met in Fiji about getting a tour and a little bit more familiar with my surroundings out here so I know where I would like to live at. The surrounding suburbs are very different from each other as in I could live in the downtown area, a beach town, a more grungy type are, and then there is more of the younger crowd party scene that is also around here. A couple of words about my hostel is that there's not much of a social scene here and the common areas is really only the bar. A lot of people work for accommodation so they have been here for a couple weeks or months all together, makes it very hard to get to meet people and it seems like you need to do the same in order to get into their circle. At most hostels there is some sort of code as far as try to initially meet someone and decide who they are from there and if they fit with you. It's hard to even cross that border here which in turn could be a good thing and help me realize that once I branch off on my own I will have friends that I either work with or I meet . That's how you make friends back home and if this is to be home then I need to start making the friends that I want and not people to help me pass the time. Every hostel I go to I meet people that are foreigners just as me and it's cool because you have that in common yet its like Italians coming to America and only hanging out with other non Americans. You don't know where the best food is you don't know where the cheap drinks are, where the girls are, also I don't want to meet girls in the bar because we all know where that might lead, I want to make some actual friends who will care where I am and won't leave me(haven't been left). I know as I like to rush things that I need to take it slow but Im out of my element and have no one to talk to it about, I try to make calls at my hostel using the internet and it cuts out on me like every 3 minutes so I have to call people back through skype and it is very annoying. I have found a couple places that are hiring bartenders and will be checking them out, I like bartending for the fact that it will cut down on my drinking since I will be working at night and hopefully will find a place with cheaper drinks by doing so as in drink for free. Well today I woke up after spending the first Saturday in a while inside and in my bed, and thought to myself what a great day, wish I had someone to share it with, well off to the market that my lonely planet(appropriately titled) had told me about and there was hundreds of little kiosks that were packed with different things from clothes district, to raw meats, to cheeses, to wines, to fruits. I buy a box of strawberries and a slice of za to have for breaky(Australian for breakfast) and then some french brie, crackers, and a bottle of wine for a later snack that I am currently consuming while watching the dark knight, new batman. I walked around for about 2 hours looking at all the shops and was wondering if I am sure if this is the place that I want to spend the next 7,8,9 months. I decide to give it a try and not give up because that is the constant thought for me right now. Give up, go home, get comfortable, the only thing that has kept me going is words from my friends about how they're happy I'm doing this and the thought of I have no idea what I want to do with my life once I do finish this trip. Work is inevitable but I'm not sure if my life will be career oriented since I don't have a passion to do much. I just wished I had some friends out here to kick it with as far as being sarcastic, the humor here is so much different, there's the little things that you don't think about, I can't understand people sometimes, they can't me, ahhhhh is all that runs through my mind. Well I also walked around for a couple hours yesterday to get a little bit more in touch with my surroundings and in the central district there's a chinatown, a target, tons of shops, and I stumbled by a skate park museum which was graffiti on skateboards and was the highlight of the day. While I'm bored tomorrow I am planning on looking for work and hitting up the Zoo or the Aquarium. Sorry for using you but when I write more often means that I'm thinking about home and when I don't means that I'm really enjoying myself at the moment. Well thanks friends and will holla again