Rio smchio

Well I arrived today and it has been nothing but sadness in my heart, like I was on the plane and had just a hole in my stomach. Maybe due to the massive drinks that I had at my going away party, its time for the percolator, but I know the difference between feeling empty and hangover. First before I describe a little bit I first want to shot out a couple of people who need to recognized for their part in my travels; first off Kerry I want to thank you for sending me my Visa from Chicago because we all know I´m last minute and I´m very lucky that you were able to help me out. Secondly Debbie, just for the time spent, the advice on traveling abroad, of course the ride to and from Chicago, and taking care of me my final night. Sorry I peep all over the floor, my mom is reading this and is very upset at me. I want to thank my grandparents for maybe it was all the exciting places they´ve been to and told me about when I was younger maybe had a little bit of influence on me and just after talking to my grandfather I´m glad that I am walking a little bit in his shoes and being places that he´s been. Darwin just for keeping my mom calm I´m sure about the situation and for cooking for the BBQ and just doing a lot for me the past couple months. Yes it does take distance and a keyboard to relay that information to you but don´t hold it against me. Everyone for making it to my going away parties, the BBQ and the library. Looking at the pictures from the library I got exactly what I wanted which is smiles on all my friends faces and being with them and at the BBQ I´m just glad I got to say goodbye before I left. Dad thanks for showing up on my last day and just saying goodbye and finally my mother. You already I couldn´t do any of this without you and I´m extremely greatful. And now I´m crying in a fuckin internet cafe. I really have not liked they way that I´ve been feeling so far just being distant from everyone and how this differs from me taking vacations by myself or going on hour long car rides is that I can´t stop thinking that I´ll be gone for what seems like right now forever and putting my faith in people who can´t speak the same language to me. Well Iknow I´ll be fine but its just hard thinking about everyone and just kind of wondering why I did this to myself. I´m sure it will all become clear but today isn´t the day that happens and I don´t know when I´ll feel at peace with my situation.

Ok I hopped on 3 planes before I landed to Rio and about a 1/2 hour cab ride later I´m dropped off in front of a bank and told this was the address I had given him. Then I panicked because I couldn´t find the hostel, made an international call and bam I´m standing right outside of my hostel. First impression was why does the hallway smell like pee, thats because the bathroom smells like pee, oh this is my room right here, the one next to the bathroom. Hurray, I unpack everything just so I know where things are(yes Kathy packed) and then decided I´d go for a walk. Luckily I packed my rain jacket with me when I left because it started to pour. Let me describe a little of what I have seen so far, filth, rivers that would make the mississippi drinkable animals that seem to have as much right to walk around as I do. We´re talking stray dogs, cows, and horses. The city is beautiful but there are places where trash is piled up and is a tomping grounds for birds of all sorts. While I´m walking in the rain, which just is not helping my attitude about things, I´m watching people and my back because we´ve all heard stories. I´m not trying to become a story, I walk to a random spot that looks clean and somewhat wealthier then the next place to eat my first meal. I had the filet mingon which cost about 11 american dollars and a stella artois which cost about 2 and have the first meal since Sunday. On my first plane I slept to Chicago, still drunk, with the puke bag in hand. It made the older lady next to me very nervous and scooted away, I did the same when I looked at her mustache. Yuck. Well not to end abrubtly and I know that this has jumped around I´m sure my writing skills will get better. I miss everyone and you´ll hear from me soon, I had a pic of my first meal but forgot the camera cord so you´ll see it later.